New Year's Celebration
I'm sure everybody is dying to know what (mis)adventures I had on December 31, 2005 so, not wanting to disappoint my beloved fans, I shall now recount my Top Ten Memories* from New Year's Eve.
*Memories may or may not be accurate due to me being the only one drinking**
**That too, may or may not be accurate, since I was drinking.
10. Crotch-sniffing Husky dogs giving me the "pat-down" upon entering the house.
9. Drunken little Jamie crashing into all her toys, then Child Services coming to take her away. Oh wait, she was just dizzy from spinning. And I must have imagined the rest.
8. Crotching-sniffing Husky dogs progressing their sniffing into licking.
7. Host-Kev and me comparing camera bags, much to the amusement of our good (dirty) friend Paul.
6. Crotch-licking Husky dogs doing some more investigating, delving deeper and deeper.
5. Crotch-licking-sniffing Husky dogs passing out in front of the wood-stove. (I wonder how that happened?)
4. Non-host-Kev's annual strip-tease by the backyard firepit.
3. Going blind, then regaining my sight. (A very joyous occasion)
2. Making my New Year's Resolution: To win the Nobel Prize for being radical to the extreme, or extreme to the max. I'm good with either one.
1. Baseball Player Zombie's purple sausage.
Yes, the highlight of the evening was Tiff's pinky toe getting crunched under the rocking chair. What does a pinky toe getting broken by a rocking chair sound like? -POP!- And as the night continued, so did the jokes about having sausage for breakfast.
The funny part was, we actually did have sausage for breakfast. And Tiff's toe was the biggest, juiciest one. Mmm!