Originally intended to document my experience of DeLorean ownership, focus is often radical and strange, boring and obtuse.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Florida: It's Like High School.

Arr, how'd that wench get offa the ship?!

Our trip to Florida was a moderately smashing success. Actually, that phrase makes about as much sense as ordering an Extra Medium coffee, so scratch that. The Florida trip was totally excellent, even though the weather wasn't.

The reason for the excellence of the trip was threefold: excellent friends, excellent price, and excellent fun.

The two friends we travelled with happen to be pilots who work for Air Canada, so procuring tickets for the airline was much less painful than usual. It doesn't even matter that we missed our first flight by 5 seconds and had to wait 5 more hours for the next one.

Nor does it matter that the toilet on that plane exploded and leaked down the side of the fuselage, then had to be cleaned up and paperwork had to be filed while we waited and waited. No. None of that matters because the price just couldn't be beat. Except, perhaps by a big European named Stipe - with a stick of course.

The highlight of the trip was an old mini-putt place near Treasure Island called Smuggler's Cove. When I was an unruly teenager the line for this place in the summer often topped an hour, as it was of amusement park quality. Now that I'm an unruly adult, I have the patience for such things, but luckily, being winter, we didn't have to wait a bit.

Grrr, raaarrr! Growl! Oink!The place was exactly as I remembered it, from the massive pirate ship right down to the super sweet, nasty-ass alligators chillin' in the artificially blueified swamp. Upon viewing the lazy gators fenced off behind a military-approved-possibily-electrified-could've-been-barb-wired fence covered in signs reading "Do not stick your fingers into the gators' eyes, buttholes or mouths", one particular friend wondered aloud if they were real.

I wondered if he should have kept that thought to himself.

This was not the first time we had to reassure our Air Canada friends that something was actually real. It was about the fourth time, in fact. After two cranes and a pelican. I don't think I've ever said, "yes, it's real!" more in my life. It didn't matter what I said as the dang things had to move before anyone believed me. Then I changed stories and explained, not-so-convincingly, that they were robots. When still no one believed me, I punched them all and ran away crying.

Like I said, I'm unruly.

Despite the rain on Thursday and the overcast Wednesday, we had a grand time hanging out in my parents' condo, eating tasty bagels, teasing each other and going to bed early. It was kind of like high school all over again.

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7 Comments:

Blogger Ellie Creek Ellis said...

sounds most excellent but i still think you get way too many vacations.

we suffered with -3F and 7 inches of snow...up to a balmy 8F now.

one time when we were flying home from Washington DC, something was wrong with the pressure in the plane and we had to wait 12 hours in the airport until we could go. mothers were trading formula for diapers, etc. the drunks got drunker...

10:28:00 PM

 
Blogger Martini said...

ah... were your drinks on the house? Sometimes they do that when you have to wait for ridiculous amounts of time.

10:44:00 PM

 
Blogger Monogram Queen said...

Sounds just like highschool! So... i'm guessing this was Air Canada's first FLA visit?
Thanks for the wave as you flew over SC (I don't know why I had assumed you would be driving LOL)

9:39:00 AM

 
Blogger The T-Dude said...

I am pretty sure that anyone dumb enough to put their hands anywhere near the mouth or anus of a gator gets what they deserve! : )

5:56:00 AM

 
Blogger Bella said...

Sounds like a great trip!

4:41:00 PM

 
Blogger Rainypete said...

Well I'm glad I don't travel with you what with the abuse and all. Actually ti would be really cool if they were robots and then malfunctioned and chased you around the park. You'd have nothing but your wits and a putter to fend off the mechanical menace. Now there'd be some vacation pics.

12:57:00 PM

 
Blogger Martini said...

Why doesn't anything exciting like that ever happen to me?

7:56:00 PM

 

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