Originally intended to document my experience of DeLorean ownership, focus is often radical and strange, boring and obtuse.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Halloween Candy Oscars 2008 - Part 5

Dr. Scab offers his finest, scabbiest treats for your eating pleasure.

Today, the wait is over. Halloween is here, and I've rolled out the bloody red carpet because it is a special occasion. This is the first time I've chosen a best chocolate for Halloween.

Is it true that good things come to those who wait? If you've waited this long to buy your Halloween candy, perhaps not, as all the good stuff is likely gone. But if you've stuck around to see the final installment of the Halloween Candy Oscars 2008 you're in for a treat.

Crummy candy companies like to shrink their standard chocolates to the tiniest sizes they can get away with. They call these dwarf treats "fun size" when the reality is they are not fun at all.

Everyone knows that with the exception of hamsters, small things aren't fun. Bigger is always better, so why are these candy companies trying to trick us into thinking small is the new fun? History will prove that society will not fall for this bit of trickery. Especially if companies like Hershey have anything to say.

Reese is the Pumpking. Ew. Huh?Around here, it is always a challenge to find Halloween-themed chocolate. But when the rare few companies put the effort into making these once-a-year treats, I will always return the favour by buying them, eating them, then excreting them. One of the best finds on store shelves is the Reese Pumpkin. Roughly pumpkin-shaped, this peanut butter delight is bigger than a regular Reese Peanut Butter Cup. Other than the size and shape, it is identical to a regular 'nut cup, which is, fantastic. Its pumpkinish shape makes eating it an even happier experience, if that is possible. Only something gory or oozing could possibly make the Reese Pumpkin better.

Enter Palmer and their tasty Dr. Scab's Monster Lab body parts. The excellent artwork on the box features body parts bursting through a rotted coffin, and even a Jacob's ladder. When the outside of the packaging is good, what's inside usually follows suit.

Inside the box, each chocolate is individually wrapped in recyclable foil. Choices are double crisp fingers, ears & toes, peanut butter filled lips and fudge filled eyes. Oozing body parts and crunchy digits make eating fun!The foil around each chocolate is printed in colour, and specific to each body part! This attention to detail is exactly what I look for in my 'ween candy. At first I wasn't expecting these to be good. To be honest, I was expecting that cheap water chocolate that's so horrible you'd rather eat your own mother's disemboweled internal bits. But I was totally surprised to find that this chocolate is very, very good. It was extremely sweet and tasty to the max.

The chocolate (and the peanut butter for that matter) in each of the opponents is not really comparable because they are so different. So, it is a matter of your own personal preference. But, considering the environment, the Palmer chocolates are a no-brainer as the packaging is 100% recyclable vs. only 50% for the Reese Pumpkin. The Monster Lab's gruesome foil wraps for each body part are a real bonus and it's because of this prime Halloween detail that I have to conclude 2008's Halloween Candy Oscars by awarding the best Halloween chocolate to Palmer for Dr. Scab's Monster Lab body parts.

Two totally green, stitched-together-but-still-oozing-a-little-bit Frankenstein thumbs up for the sweet chocolate, and the wicked foil wrap on each one. This kind of treat really puts the big-name chocolate companies to shame as they put greater care into making kids' Halloween nights (and the belly-aching days that follow) super-duper special.

Check out Halloween Candy Oscars - Part 4.
Check out Halloween Candy Oscars - Part 3.
Check out Halloween Candy Oscars - Part 2.
Check out Halloween Candy Oscars - Part 1.

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8 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Hey, Martini: I am enjoying The Candy Oscars here! They are actually more exciting than the televised movie Oscars! Hey wait...maybe next year you could consider televising this! :D)! If you doit, please credit me as a "Consultant" and run the credits slowly! :D) HAPPY HALLOWEN, MARTINI!

11:15:00 AM

 
Blogger Martini said...

You know I would - I'm a total sellout. Happy Halloween to you too! Glad my candy choices were entertaining.

11:47:00 AM

 
Blogger Velvet Ginger said...

I don't think one could come up with a worse name than "Dr. Scab's " with green crap oozing out!!!! rlmao@that!!! We don't have those Reese Pumpkin candy things...those sound really good!
Today is your day Marty McFly!!! HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

7:07:00 PM

 
Blogger Velvet Ginger said...

On my blog, "Maxine" caqlls the little bite size candy bars "bite-me" size! lol

10:04:00 PM

 
Blogger Unknown said...

HAppy HAlloween !

Ears, eyes, fingers, lips... I assume they stay away from the fun body parts :)

4:25:00 AM

 
Blogger Martini said...

SJ - that gives me a brilliant idea! Maybe next year I'll check out the chocolates offered at the "Love Shop"!

10:44:00 AM

 
Blogger Monogram Queen said...

I'm back-reading here, can't miss this after all the anticipation!
I like the Russel Stover Orange Marshmallow Pumpkins and the Kit Kat Halloween mini bars too.

11:15:00 AM

 
Anonymous Bock Auf Rock said...

Thanks for wwriting this

7:18:00 AM

 

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