The Remington Remedy

I am overwhelmed by how much stuff sucks these days. I've always been a big fan of Remington, so when I couldn't get parts for my old, square, heavy, black, corded, manly Remington electric razor, I decided to buy this Remington Titanium.

After approximately 1 full year of regular use, this rechargeable Remington razor sort of broke. Kind of. What happened was that the trimmer, the only part that has any titanium on it, would not push back down. It was always engaged, always rubbing against my skin even when I didn't want it, like a Neanderthal hacking away at my face with a giant stone axe.

I got a bit frustrated with the trimmer constantly draining the precious electricity hidden magically within the battery. My electricity bills were soaring so I decided to do something. I hate doing nothing. And I hate when stuff breaks. I decided to take my Remington apart and fix it.

First I removed the foil, and popped off all three cutters inside, which gave me access to the four microscopic screws. If you're uncomfortable using a screwdriver in conjunction with a microscope, crack it open with a big rock, gorilla-style. It will likely void the warranty but it will certainly open up the plastic casing.

Once the screws are removed you can morbidly separate the head from the body. When I pulled the two sections apart I discovered a monster pile of my old whiskers jamming up the poor trimmer and the springs that make it pop up. For the next hour or two I cleaned the whiskers out of the tiny gaps in the base of the titanium trimmer. If you dare to have a close-up look at my grossness, click here.

So why did the Remington clog up?

Because the trimmer pops up, it has a tiny gap around it. Over the course of about 12 months, my lil' whiskers snuck their way down inside the razor each time I pushed the trimmer back down. With extreme whisker accumulation, the plastic trimmer wouldn't click back down.

I'm happy to report that the Remington surgery went well, and the trimmer works properly again. Sadly, I know this will happen again because modern companies prefer profits to happy customers which leads to disposability instead of reliablity.