Originally intended to document my experience of DeLorean ownership, focus is often radical and strange, boring and obtuse.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Halloween Candy Oscars

Dentists, like Steve Martin in Little Shop of Horrors, love candy.
There should be certain rules, or laws, that candy manufacturers must adhere to in order to call their sugar "Halloween candy."

Sadly, these days, Halloween candy is nothing more than regular candy packaged in bags and boxes with pictures of bats, pumpkins, ghosts and the occasional dilapidated, and therefore haunted, Victorian-era houses.

Shame on you candy companies!

That is why I specifically go out of my way to ONLY purchase novelty Halloween candy - ie, candy that is shaped like something spooky, or has something directly related to Halloween printed on it. These very few companies are tops in my book, and I have invented the Halloween Candy Oscars to honour them and promote these fantastic treats.

Remember those orange gumballs that had jack-o-lantern faces on them? Allan's candy Kisses? "Monster" candy? And the most recent candy demise - Charm's Dead Heads? Ah, those sweet skull-shaped grape suckers.....White skulls that turned your mouth blood red. What a fantastic Halloween candy! Now, just a memory.

Anybody can buy any kind of chocolate bar or candy year-round. WHY would you want the same boring stuff at Halloween? You could've bought the same thing at the corner store the day before. Tell me, what is the appeal?

Muhuhahaha!Thank evilness there are still companies like Concord (who?), yes, Concord Confections, who have filled the Halloween niche with products like their collection of gumballs: Count Blacula, Slime Balls, Pumpkin Seedlings, and Horror Eyes. And hooray for Gummy Zone's Gummy Fangs. Not only can you eat them, but you can pretend to be Dracula for a little while first. What a bonus!

Pretty much everybody out there likes chocolate, and thankfully Hershey's even offers pumpkin and ghost-shape-stamped chocolates. Two skeleton thumbs up Hershey's!

2004's Halloween Candy Oscar most certainly goes to Charm's for their Dead Heads. But this year it is a tougher decision. After carefully weighing the criteria for "Halloween" candy, the board (me), has decided to award the 2005 Halloween Candy Oscar to Concord for their gumballs. The reason they beat out Gummy Zone for this prestigious award is because they offer four different gumballs, each with their own uniquely creepy properties.

Like blood, slime, seeds, and... um, horror.

Thank you to all 5 companies that qualified this year. I hope to invite you back again next year!

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12 Comments:

Blogger Dusty said...

OMG I want to try one of those pumpkin seeding gumballs!!

12:50:00 PM

 
Blogger Martini said...

What was that gum that had the powdery flavour crystals inside it? Remember? It was a square, almost cube shaped gum with rounded corners. Mmmm, that was good gum!

2:53:00 PM

 
Blogger Rainypete said...

It's about time someone started to produce halloween candy that isn't just microscopic versions of everyday candy!!

7:20:00 PM

 
Blogger ms. creek said...

i love the candy corn, which is more like an autumn candy than halloween, but, it is seasonal....and anything chocolate....shaped like halloween, of course, and i used to love getting apples in my halloween bag, those candied apples with nuts on them...

we always had at least 12 inches of snow to trapes through. mom used to make my costume, and of course i would have to put my winter coat on then my costume when trying it out.

bringing back some good memories here....some authentic halloween memories, much like the authentic halloween candy....

8:34:00 PM

 
Blogger ms. creek said...

BTW, do you like my shirt?

8:36:00 PM

 
Blogger Lo said...

Martini, i don't think i know anyone who likes halloween as much as you. that's awesome. my g-ma used to make us caramel apples for halloween it was the BEST.

sorry it took me so long to post my updates on the crazy lady but it up now

9:12:00 PM

 
Blogger Red Egg said...

DId you ever hear of that gum/candy called SHOCKERS?

10:07:00 AM

 
Blogger Martini said...

red egg - Shockers were super sour right?

Yes, candy corn and candy apples are indeed excellent autumn candy, and still available every year! Ellie, do I detect some sarcasm in your shirt? D.C. = Bush.

10:35:00 AM

 
Blogger stillfindingnemo said...

mmmm....shut up and pass me some chocolate. No really. I miss the days I could bite the heads off of candy skeletons and mash eyeballs in my teeth.

6:25:00 PM

 
Blogger Martini said...

LOL at SFN!
You're a closet Halloween Fanatic, aren't you?

3:46:00 PM

 
Blogger Rowan said...

Glad to see there is someone else out there that agrees halloween should be spooky, not commercial, thanks for stopping by my blog...I'll certainly be back.

9:27:00 AM

 
Blogger stillfindingnemo said...

Me? Maybe. *insert evil laugh here*

10:33:00 AM

 

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